About being pregnant in your 50s
There are challenges being pregnant at any age, but I think I found a few unique to older moms-to-be.
The first one is believing it yourself!
I had to refill a prescription for estrogen the week after my final blood test came back positive, so I was maybe 3 weeks pregnant. When the pharmacist at Duane Reade handed me the bottle, I noticed there were stickers on it that read, “Do not take if you are pregnant or nursing.” I called her over and asked her to confirm this for me thinking maybe I had made a mistake, and I was supposed to stop taking the estrogen once my pregnancy was confirmed. She said to me, “You’re not pregnant, right?” and for the first time aloud to a stranger, I said the words, “Yes, I’m pregnant.” Over the next 9 months, even when I was noticeably pregnant, I still would hear myself saying the words and think, “Really? Or are you just crazy?” I used to watch way too many soap operas. Maybe I was having some sort of breakdown, and everyone I knew had been told to play along and not point out to me how ridiculous I sounded telling people I was pregnant at age 50. Like, never wake a sleepwalker, and don’t tell the old gal she’s not pregnant.
It is also nearly impossible to find age-appropriate maternity clothes at 50, not surprisingly I guess. It the same reason VH1 doesn’t have a show called “50 and Pregnant.” How big could that target market possibly be? Work clothes weren’t too bad; I just found black stretchy pants and big tops and that worked through my 7th month, when I went out on leave (more about that early leave later). But as far as casual clothes, almost all of them are designed to fit pregnant young 20-ish women who still want to go out clubbing. Case in point:
Yes, it’s a cute dress, but I wouldn’t wear that now pregnant or not pregnant. The “skirt-above-the-knee”
ship sailed in the late 90s, as well it should have. Not to mention the “upper-arm-spaghetti-strap” train, which left the station in the 80s….Let’s not even talk about the “no-need-to-wear-a-bra” bus….
Then again, no one at any age should be forced to dress like this:
Although that hat definitely would have covered up my gray roots, and no one could accuse me of trying to look like a hipster in that creation.
I opened my mailbox one day to find an AARP invitation mailer AND a Victoria Secret catalog in the same delivery. Well, I thought it was funny.
On the other hand, there were the moments that made me realize just how lucky we are. I had two women approach me when my condition became obvious to share their stories with me. I referred both to CWRC, and maybe one day I’ll hear wonderful news from them.
I keep thinking of “our miracle,” which D objects to. We are both, on our most spiritual days, agnostics, and I don’t mean miracle in a jesus-y, burning bush kind of way, but he is a miracle.
I’ll explain more in my next post.
Next time: My scariest night.
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