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Menopause is the new puberty

October 8, 2015

Or at the very least, it’s the puberty of middle age. Let’s review.

Signs of puberty:

  • Acne–devastating, but hopefully treatable and finite
  • Weight gain–in a sexy, filling out kind of way, usually
  • Hair sprouting in previously unhairy places–ok, not fun at any age
  • Hormonally induced fits of weepiness and moodiness/anger

Signs of menopause:

  • Acne–oh, yay! menopause acne is a thing!
  • Weight gain–in a decidedly not sexy, yet still filling out kind of way
  • Hair–along chin and neck (fucking seriously?)
  • Hormonally induced fits of weepiness and moodiness/anger (I cried last night watching Jeopardy!)

At least with puberty, you have your “Sexual 20s” to look forward to when it finally ends. You’ll never hear anyone talk about their “Sexual 60s,” or if they do, yuck, and you can probably bet they’re lying. Or they meant the actual decade, “The ’60s.”

© 2015 grayhairedmom.com

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2 Comments
  1. Anonymous permalink

    You are so so funny Sally!

    Like

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